How do you keep a free market free?

That's a good question and thank you for asking it.

1st, you get a bunch of nails from China, wait a minute, maybe I got the wrong country.
Anyhow, you get a bunch of nails from some place. Where from? I don't care where from, just get some nails and quit pestering me about where they came from, jeez, just put the gosh darn nails in a box and ship them to Mexico.
Then, you take them out of the box they came in and put them in another box and ship them someplace else. I DON'T CARE WHERE.

But don't step on them because if you step on a rusty nail--- we all remember the Alton Giant and happened to him? He died. I don't want to die, that's why I got this good government run healthcare. Quick, get a big block of cheese and put it in a trap....

2nd, you put on a sweater because if "momma's cold, everyone is cold".

3rd, then you open the door and throw away the key, much like that old pancake house on Jefferson Avenue did before they tore it down and built a bank.

4th, that's how you keep a free market free.

Now, enough of this talk about me. Let's talk about you.

How do you like my new shirt?



This just in from Billy Long: "Homeland Security Chairman Peter King appointed me Vice Chairman of The Oversight, Investigations, and Management."

Way to go Billy! You'll be able to put your knowledge of the free market system to good use!